CHICAGO—Easily spotting what they described as a textbook
example of a fabricated crime, members of the Chicago Police Department on
Friday credited their own extensive experience falsifying evidence with helping
them solve the case of actor Jussie Smollett’s staged attack.
“We’ve been doing this sort of thing for decades, so we
were really able to bring a lot of expertise to bear on this matter,” said CPD
superintendent Eddie Johnson, adding that his officers—many of whom have built
their careers on falsifying evidence to further their personal interests—were
quick to notice similarities between Smollett’s letter containing crushed
aspirin and their own tried-and-true method of planting cocaine on drivers
during traffic stops.
“One look at that letter, and our detectives, who have
forged hundreds of documents themselves, knew it was a fake. And of course, the
supposed attack was immediately suspicious because nearly all violent crimes in
this city end with a dead black man at the scene. So this was very much an
open-and-shut case.”
Johnson went on to state that it was a shame Smollett had
taken on too much too soon and wasted his potential talent for covering up
unlawful, self-serving behavior, as the young man could have had a bright
future with the force.
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